Cranmer was rather keen on marriage. Being that he got married twice. First, before he had taken orders, to a young woman who worked at a local inn. She sadly died in child birth and he went back and became a priest. The second marriage was to Margarette, niece of reformer Osiander. This one lasted the rest of his life and with her he had two kids – one boy and one girl.

Cromwell is clearly a tetris playing contortionist. Anyone who says otherwise is WRONG.

Taken from an image that struck me whilst I was writing an essay about them last year. Inspired by a line that went ‘The creation of the Office of Vice-Gerent of Spirituals catapulted Thomas Cromwell into the forefront of politics leaving the less steely Cranmer in the theological background’. Or something like that. I can’t be sure.

Poor Crumbucket is all I have to say. Though I think he enjoyed the ride while it lasted.

Ah Florence. There’s nothing quite like complete and utter military incompetence due to governmental in-fighting and a lack of money due to an overpowering fear of taxation. Though Soderini did his best to rey and resolve the issue when he was gonfalonier (1502 to 1512) but then the Medicis came back and it all went to hell in a very fast, expensive, bright red car. Or something to that extent.
Machiavelli can tell you more. Though it will read rather jaundiced and jaded. Though having been tortured by the Medicis, it’s none too surprising his lack of enthusiasm for princes. (contrary to popular belief).

Charming!

It was recorded by a bishop in the 13th century (I believe) that a certain parish in England was having problems due to a priest going about flashing people. Good times in England.

Sorry about the many many monthed hiatus. Life happens. As well as a lack of inspirations and scanners. Hopefully will be a little more regular from now on. Some entertainment taken at the expense of Florence’s inefficiencies will be coming up soon. Hurrah.

Diocletian was one of the last emperors of the western Roman Empire and was famous foe introducing the Tetrarchic system in order to try and solve the inheritance problem (being that Augustus never formally declared how the empire was to be inherited). Needless to say the tetrarchic system failed on an epic level due to greed, power mongering, and more greed.
When he retired he did his best to stay out of politics but in-spite of this he was asked to come back to power to which he replied “If you could show the cabbage that I planted with my own hands to your emperor, he definitely wouldn’t dare suggest that I replace the peace and happiness of this place with the storms of a never-satisfied greed”.

And why is Diocletian beard-less here? I couldn’t tell you.

I do way too many reformation comics. I just find it a funny time. Zwingli and his penchant for ironic deaths might be next. That or something completely different and do philosopher comics for a bit. Hobbes! Hobbes! “You haven’t read the section of my book on religion!” Hobbes!

Poor Charles, so many problems, so little time.

We’re taking a break from Charles V, since I’ve another comic about him coming up. But for now, I bring you The Medicis. This is Lorenzo II Medici, also known as, Lorenzo the Not As Cool As His Grandfather and Great Great Grandfather Medici. The grandfather is the ghost thing in the corner, Lorenzo de Medici (or Lorenzo il Magnifico). The great great grandfather was Cosimo, the man with a plan who started it all. There were some Piero’s between the Cosimos and Lorenzos but they weren’t as cool. If you’re a Medici, never name your son Piero.

The Medicis were kicked out of Florence a couple of times for being too obvious about their power grabbing schemes. Amateurs.

Just imagine being Holy Roman Emperor. Charles V had one hell of schedule, let me tell you. I don’t even want to know what his Bucket List is like.

That said, if Charles V had a business card, this is what it would read:
Charles V;
Holy Roman Emperor, King of Spain, King of Hungary, Inheritor of more land than I knew what to do with, Nephew of Queen Katherine of Aragon, Idealist, Romantic, Self Appointed Christian Champion who has been Chosen by God to Defend the Good Christian People of Europe, and Knight in Shining Armor with a Very Large Chin.

Sexy.

I hope you all remember Petrarch and Salutati from this post. I really just get a kick out of the fact that Salutati perfected Times New Roman font. And no, I don’t think Salutati was actually like this, or actually stalked Petrarch. Facebook didn’t exist back then, how else do people stalk people?

It really is surprising, when you think about how much sex Casanova had, that he didn’t have a gaggle of illegitimate brats. Ramesses, you need to stop screwing everyone in your harem and rule the country. Though from what I understand he did that pretty decently, he was just a busy man in the evenings.